That is one rather depressing title for my 100th deliberate day. I think the only title that could possibly top that would be “Day 100 – the day I deliberately realized I am going to be a fat dude for the rest of my life and no one will like me and I’ll end up broke on the streets making money by selling off spare body parts”. Which reminds me, on a serious note, one of my friends is on a kidney transplant list and I should see if I am a match for him. And it’s his birthday.
A short video from Randy Pausch got me thinking today about my life and the fact I’m going to die.
He didn’t really say it but he said it: don’t wait until you are given a termination date to start living.
I think back to my posts about deliberately enjoying the thousands of small moments that make up each day. And how, even now. I’m still missing out on those moments. I spent around 6 hours today working on things around the house. But I only spent maybe 2 hours with my bride, and maybe 1 hour with the kids. My teenager is not complaining, she is not big on parental time right now, but overall, it wasn’t a great example of the right balance of my time.
So Dr. Pausch hit on a few things that I can incorporate into my deliberate year. He questioned people about whether they are a Tigger, or are they an Eeyore. Thanks to Gretchen Rubin, I can discern that easier. That is, do I say things like:
“Happiness is a choice.”
“Look on the bright side.”
“Fake it ‘till you feel it.”
Or do I say things like:
“No one can be cheerful all the time. It’s fake.”
“Thinking the glass is always half-full isn’t realistic. It’s self-deception.”
“If someone asks me, ‘How are you?’ I’m going to tell the truth, even if people don’t want an honest answer.”
“Authenticity is important to me. I hate phonies.”
The first group is what a Tigger would say, and the second group is what an Eeyore would say. Now, I sort of disagree with Dr. Pausch as he made it sound as if being a Tigger would make life be more fun and joyful than being an Eeyore. But I feel the Eeyore personality can be a legitimate way of feeling. Regardless, I do associate myself with being a Tigger, and I will take Dr. Pausch’s main point which is to have fun in this life making it my #1 deliberate action for the day.
My #2 action comes from his statement: “Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.”, tagged onto another statement of his: “I can either take my finite time complaining, or I can play the game hard.” This just reinforces my deliberate year principles of small moments and the SEAL mentality: small moments times 20X = my overall best effort. I may not get what I desire, but I always need to give my all. And then I need to learn from the outcome.